Who says love isn’t eternal? Not me!
Can love between two people really last a lifetime? Can it evolve into something that exists well into the future, literally decades upon decades? More particularly, can a Honeymoon Period, that first exciting and hopeful stage of love, actually turn into something that can last forever?
I say, why not?
I know it happens, and more than you think! After all, my book, Honeymoon Forever: Secrets to Long-Term Intimacy, is all about the possibility of enduring love and intimacy that can last a lifetime—and beyond!
“… the Honeymoon Period, if pursued with the right knowledge and positive spirit, can contain and engender great intimacy and shared loving feelings, which can carry over into a love relationship that lasts for a lifetime!”
A fanciful fantasy, you say? Some fictional illusion? A delusion? Not so!
I’ve seen the phenomenon of never-ending love materialize over and over again. In fact, many of our more “experienced” couples are adamant that love and the Honeymoon Period never end, that the fire and passion of the “in love” state can go on and on, ad infinitum.
As one of our enthusiastic interviewees put it: “It may not be the same, like when we first met, but for us, it’s not over yet!”
Psychologist Nancy Wesson adds her thoughtful take on the creative effort needed to keep love’s momentum alive:
“It is possible to have a successful relationship and to remain special to each other even after many years of being together. However, you must be willing to cultivate and build your relationship. The couple relationship itself has its own needs and when these are met, the relationship will creatively evolve over time.”
Are some of you more skeptical types still thinking that the idea of eternal love is only the fabrication of dreamy-eyed bards, made up and doled out by slick Hollywood screenwriters?
Maybe you need a bit of proof – something more demonstrable?
Here’s some scientific food for thought
A fairly recent (2009) SUNY Stony Brook study compared brain scans of older couples, having been together an average of 21 years, with a group of younger, “freshly-in love” couples. Interestingly, the older couples responded with as much passion and desire as the younger couples. Also, when the study subjects were shown pictures of their partners, about ten percent of the older couples had chemical reactions similar to those that were “new” to love. These researchers came to the conclusion that the older couples could be just as much in love as their younger counterparts.
Arthur Aaron, Ph.D., one of the principal researchers of this groundbreaking study states: “We found many very clear similarities between those who were in love long-term and those who had just fallen madly in love.”
Another researcher intimately associated with the Stony Brook study, Dr. Bianca Acevedo, says that “lifelong love is possible” – this despite the usual conventional thinking about love, which says that love drops off after 15 months, and is completely gone after 10 years.
Both researchers believe that their results support theories concerning “reward value” and certain brain mechanisms that keep passionate romance alive in long-term love relationships. Moreover, these social scientists were reportedly very surprised at the high level of intense feelings found in so many of these long-term partnerships.
Keith Davis, emeritus professor of Psychology at the University of South Carolina makes a cultural comment: “I think popular literature underestimates how many retain an intense level of emotional investment in their partners.”
Some of those who participated in the study talk about their own conclusions and feelings when it comes to long-lasting love. Eugene Williams (age 71) expresses his thoughts: “The love hasn’t changed… it’s just gotten better…”
Another subject, Carole Wozniak (age 71) reflects:
“You’re with somebody for fifty years, you share the same things, you enjoy the same things. That, of course, makes the passion. It changes a little, but I feel the same. When I saw my husband fifty years ago, it was a chemical reaction… I still feel that way today.”
And her husband, Walter, shares his emotional and touching view on the subject: “I still love her like I did when we were first courting…”
So, do you still believe love is finite? Does love always end? Is romance destined to eventual failure? Are all intimate beginnings, all Honeymoon Periods of love relationships, fated to ruin? Is the waning of love just something inevitable, like death and taxes?
We think not! We’ll go even one step farther: lifelong love is not only possible, but a certainty if carefully nurtured, from the very beginning. All is takes is a mixture of devoted effort and the essential freedom needed for a successful partnership to develop naturally over time.
It’s just a fact; the ceaseless flame burns brightly, and like time itself- love remains eternal!
Check out my book to learn how easy it can be to create an eternal honeymoon period.